Friday, August 5, 2011

If Only...

Have you ever felt like you were just one step away from being really happy?  You know, just one "if only" away from living your best life.

If only I had more money.
If only I were married.
If only I were single.
If only I had children.
If only I had a different job.
If only I were prettier, skinnier, taller, healthier.
If only I didn't have this damn disease.

The list goes on and on.

While it might be true that some things would make life better (certainly digging myself out of medical debt would be fabulous) do we have to wait for those things to happen to really be happy?  Trust me, I understand the stress of looking for a job, the heartache of not being able to get pregnant, the longing for something, well... different.  I understand.  I'm not saying that we shouldn't want things, and I'm definitely not saying that we shouldn't strive to make certain things happen.  Growth and change are essential to life.  What I am saying is that we shouldn't spend the bulk of our lives one step away from greatness.

In case you're wondering - I'm writing this for everyone, but I'm really speaking to myself.  Please excuse the soliloquy.

Here's my point.  Let's say your position is "If only I had a different job, then I'd be truly happy."  Yup, this is a good one.  I'm sure many of us have said/thought/believed this one.  Okay, now what if I said you could be truly happy right now, where you're at, without changing your circumstances?  I know, I know, you're rolling your eyes and thinking, "She obviously doesn't know my circumstances."  You're right, I don't, but I do know this (from lots and lots of personal experience):  We often get so consumed in our current situation that we can't see the forest for the trees.  The cloud of confusion, and sometimes hopelessness, paralyzes us from even the smallest steps forward and blinds us from our current blessings.

Maybe you really do need to get out of your current job.  You aren't using your skills, strengths and talents.  You aren't being challenged.  You're surrounded by negative people.  Whatever the case is, I'm sure there are lots of reasons why getting out of your current situation would be a good idea.  The problem I have is wasting the weeks, days, and minutes of our lives until that change happens.  Make a plan to transition out of your current situation and be empowered by the small steps you take to make that happen.  Maybe it means taking a class or two, maybe it means networking with a different group of people, maybe it means spending an hour on-line every night looking at job openings and submitting your resume.  Yes, be active in making that change, just don't be consumed (and yes, I think there is a difference between the two).  Your life, my life, is taking place as we speak.  It's not waiting for us to arrive at our "if only" destination.

Life is happening right now.  Take a deep breath and notice it.  Then choose to live it, the best way you know how, right where you are.

Thanks for listening,


  1. love the post kim! keep them coming :)

  2. If only I knew what soliloquy meant...haha So shame, I googled it! I'm not representing our Alma Mater well. :(
    Thanks for this post. Good word!

  3. Kim - maybe you could consider writing a daily devotional or something - your writing is just so crazy awesome - you keep making me cry and smile and sometimes at the same time!!!!

  4. Ash: Thanks. xoxo

    J: Ok, that cracked me up.

    V: Thank you! Hope the cries are happy cries. I'm considering what to do next so your thoughts and encouragement are appreciated. Miss you.

  5. Kim,

    Love this - I kept saying to myself... exactly, exactly!

    So glad we've connected!

    xox - Jenna

  6. Thanks for the reminder, Kim. You write beautifully. Yup, the hands of time keep on ticking whether we live each moment to the fullest, or not. xo