Thursday, November 10, 2011

A New Day

Last night I went to bed feeling overwhelmed.  Frustrated by the ups an downs of AS, annoyed by the pain that won't seem to go away, anxious about the future and decisions that need to be made.  I tossed and turned throughout the night, counting down the hours til little ones would need my full attention and worry would have to take the backseat.  At 3 a.m. I realized that if I didn't do something to get out of my "slump" it may just decide to stick around.  So, I did what I normally never do.  I set my alarm so I would wake up before my girls. 

I rolled out of bed while it was still dark, still quiet, determined to start the day focused on promise, not pain. I curled up with Ann Voskamp's book, One Thousand Gifts.  Ann is an incredibly gifted, poetic writer that challenges you to live a life of radical gratitude.  It was just what I needed.  Once again, perspective changes everything.    

And then I decided to write.  Not on my keyboard, not for the world to read, but the good old fashioned way, with paper and pen - just for me, just for God, just because.  It was healing.

And in perfect timing, the quiet broke.  One by one, I heard, "Mama."  Beautiful.  Music to my ears.  "Mama." I was ready for them.  I was ready for the day.

We headed to the kitchen and big sister helped make our morning green smoothies.  

Fresh spinach and kale...

Almond milk, banana, flax seed and greek yogurt.  I'm currently on an almond milk kick.  It is high in Vitamin D and Riboflavin and tastes delicious.  I haven't gone completely dairy free, but I choose my dairy sources carefully.  Right now, I opt for plain greek yogurt in my smoothies. High in protein and calcium and low in sugar = winner.  I also add 1 tablespoon of flax seed which provides additional fiber and an abundance of omega-3 fatty acids.  

Delicious.  Seriously delicious.  Big sister kept asking me if it was a green "vanilla milkshake." Baby girl cried when her glass was empty.  

Morning Green Smoothie:
- crushed ice
- 1 cup almond milk
- hand full of spinach
- hand full of kale
- 1 banana 
- 1 tablespoon ground flax seed
- 1/2 cup of plain greek yogurt

Blend and enjoy!

Before rushing out the door, stopped for a minute to appreciate the mid-November sunshine.

Sometimes we just need to stop, make some adjustments and chose how we want to move forward.  There is still pain, still decisions to be made, still ups and down, but my body, mind and spirit are ready to take on a new day - and that makes all the difference.



  1. Thank you so much for sharing this. I love Ann's book and I love journaling and I love having sister-friends in the world who get loss or pain or even, specificially, mothering with AS.

    You bless me.
    This blesses me.

  2. Precisous Loving God, As David pleaded in his Psalm, restore unto Kim the joy of Your salvation and sustain her with a willing spirit, your Spirit! Lord, for us all. Amen.

  3. Thank you, Jennifer. Yes, it's comforting to have others who understand. This is a journey I wasn't quite ready for, but now that I'm here I will choose to journey well. So glad you're on it with me.


  4. Oh my gosh, I make almost that exact same smoothie (minus the yogurt.) I vary it a bit, using strawberries or blueberries along with the banana when I have it. I also use chia seeds sometimes. Ann's book has been a lifesaver for me... truly, the best pick me up every time I turn to it. Blessings to you- thanks for showing us how to turn it around even when we don't feel up to it!

  5. As always Kim - beautiful - thank you

  6. We just made this smoothie with the banana, love it! Andrew said, " it's orange juice," he is thrilled, it tastes so good he thinks it is juice!