A New Day

Last night I went to bed feeling overwhelmed.  Frustrated by the ups an downs of AS, annoyed by the pain that won't seem to go away, anxious about the future and decisions that need to be made.  I tossed and turned throughout the night, counting down the hours til little ones would need my full attention and worry would have to take the backseat.  At 3 a.m. I realized that if I didn't do something to get out of my "slump" it may just decide to stick around.  So, I did what I normally never do.  I set my alarm so I would wake up before my girls. 

I rolled out of bed while it was still dark, still quiet, determined to start the day focused on promise, not pain. I curled up with Ann Voskamp's book, One Thousand Gifts.  Ann is an incredibly gifted, poetic writer that challenges you to live a life of radical gratitude.  It was just what I needed.  Once again, perspective changes everything.    

And then I decided to write.  Not on my keyboard, not for the world to read, but the good old fashioned way, with paper and pen - just for me, just for God, just because.  It was healing.

And in perfect timing, the quiet broke.  One by one, I heard, "Mama."  Beautiful.  Music to my ears.  "Mama." I was ready for them.  I was ready for the day.

We headed to the kitchen and big sister helped make our morning green smoothies.  

Fresh spinach and kale...

Almond milk, banana, flax seed and greek yogurt.  I'm currently on an almond milk kick.  It is high in Vitamin D and Riboflavin and tastes delicious.  I haven't gone completely dairy free, but I choose my dairy sources carefully.  Right now, I opt for plain greek yogurt in my smoothies. High in protein and calcium and low in sugar = winner.  I also add 1 tablespoon of flax seed which provides additional fiber and an abundance of omega-3 fatty acids.  

Delicious.  Seriously delicious.  Big sister kept asking me if it was a green "vanilla milkshake." Baby girl cried when her glass was empty.  

Morning Green Smoothie:

- crushed ice

- 1 cup almond milk

- hand full of spinach

- hand full of kale

- 1 banana 

- 1 tablespoon ground flax seed

- 1/2 cup of plain greek yogurt

Blend and enjoy!

Before rushing out the door, stopped for a minute to appreciate the mid-November sunshine.

Sometimes we just need to stop, make some adjustments and chose how we want to move forward.  There is still pain, still decisions to be made, still ups and down, but my body, mind and spirit are ready to take on a new day - and that makes all the difference.

Kim 

Back to Basics

So...last week I learned how to sit.  And stand. And sleep and squat and lift and carry.  Yup, I got play by play instructions and a handout to study.

I'm not joking.

Tomorrow I go to part 2 of "Six Efficient Movement Principles" with a physical therapist.  I wish I could roll my eyes and tell you what a waste of time it us.   I mean, come on, I know how to sit.  But actually, it was an amazing hour and I learned a lot.  And for some reason I was holding back tears the whole time.  I'm not exactly sure why I was so emotional. Maybe it has something to do with the following:

*  Let's be honest, AS's goal is to fuse my spine together (thus the nickname "bamboo spine").  I guess I'm trying to fight what they say is inevitable.

*  I appreciate black and white practical tips.  I like having concrete things that I can do, things that can make me stronger. It helps me not feel so powerless.  Still, I didn't think tips on "how to get up out of a chair" would mean so much to me.

*  I think of myself as strong - physically, mentally, spiritually. Recently though, I've had to redefine "strong."

*  Sometimes I sit at the doctor's office, lay on the table at physical therapy, and think "Is this really me?"

*  Keeping a straight posture has become harder to do these days.  I'm not sure if I'm just inflamed or if something else is happening.

*  I'm learning how to modify everything - from the way I type to the way I play with my kids to the way I grab something off the top shelf.   A part of me embraces the "new normal" but the rest of me just wants "normal" back.

For someone who used to go 100 mph and juggle too many balls at once, this whole slowing down thing has not been easy.  I guess I have a lot to learn.  Thankfully, there's time.  And I'll just take things one step at a time - literally.

Standing Tall,
Kim 

When 5 = 35 (turning wristbands into opportunity)

As a follow up to yesterday's post, I wanted to share this clip of Starbucks President and CEO, Howard Schultz.  I think it is a fine example of businesses and corporations taking a step toward social consciousness.  Hopefully others will follow suit.  In the meantime, the next time you go for your morning latte, pick up a $5 Indivisible wristband. Let's help create meaningful jobs that pay a living wage.  

Until tomorrow,
Kim

Create Jobs for USA

You don't have to look hard to find it:  "for lease" signs on the windows of once flourishing businesses, parks and squares occupied by frustrated citizens, foreclosure notices on your neighbor's front door - signs of a wounded economy, signs that something needs to happen.

I have no interest in a political debate.  I have no interest in pointing fingers, finding fault and placing blame.  I am more interested in solutions and being part of them.

The truth is, regardless of how you have been affected, the economy remains top of mind for most Americans.   For me, mounting medical bills (with the majority being covered by insurance) and $2400/month medication (also covered by insurance) keeps me thankful, yet vigilant.  

Recently I joined the BlogHer Publishing Network, a community of women bloggers who write on topics from politics to parenting in an atmosphere of integrity and respect.  Last week, BlogHer announced that they are partnering with Starbucks and Opportunity Finance Network (OFN) to get the word out on an amazing initiative:  Create Jobs for USA.

Starbucks and OFN recognize that small businesses are still the backbone of America.  Yet, the spiraling economy and credit crisis has stifled the growth of these businesses.  As long as small businesses remain at a standstill, so will our nation's economy.  Create Jobs for USA is not waiting for Washington.  They are not wasting time complaining and pointing fingers.

OFN is a network of lending institutions that invest in community businesses, focusing on opportunities that benefit low-income, low-wealth and other disadvantaged communities across the U.S.

And regardless of what you think about Starbucks (their coffee or their corporate presence) they have contributed 5 million dollars to seed the Create Jobs for USA fund.  Five million dollars that will provide loans to underserved community businesses, including small businesses, microenterprises, nonprofit organizations, commercial real estate and affordable housing.  The goal is to create and sustain jobs throughout the U.S.  Now how can you argue with that?

To learn more about this initiative and how you can get involved, check out Create Jobs for USA.


Indivisible,
Kim 

Finding Beauty

"Seek the wisdom of the ages, but look at the world through the eyes of a child."  

~ Ron Wild 

The other day, my girls and I went for a walk.  I brought my camera so my 3-year old could take pictures along the way.  It always amazes me.  She stops and appreciates the smallest things, sees things I don't see, teaches me how to slow down and notice the world around me.  I love seeing things through her eyes.  There is beauty and wonder and wisdom at every turn.  I hope you enjoy her pictures.  

She loved the way the sun was shining through the leaves.

Up close.

Loving the fall colors.

"Mommy, remember this tree was green just a few weeks ago.  Isn't that cool?"  

"Hey mom, hold this leaf so I can get a close-up."  

"Can you believe how tall these trees are?  I wonder when they'll stop growing."

Trying to get the perfect angle.

"I love the shape of these guys."  

"These look yummy but I don't think I should eat them."  

"Look!!  The sky is all blue. Perfect blue."  

"I want to live in this beautiful garden."

Handing over my camera is probably one of the best things I've done.  A simple walk around the block will never be the same.  I'm learning to stop, crouch down, look up, be aware, take it all in and see the world through the eyes of a child.  And I must say, the view from here is amazing.

Finding beauty,
Kim

Cinnamon Butternut Squash Soup

I held on as long as I could, but I can no longer pretend.  

Summer is long gone and the cold is officially here.      

So what's a girl to do on a chilly November evening besides watch the leaves fall and the sun set way too early?  Well, in the spirit of embracing fall, you make butternut squash soup of course.  Now doesn't the sound of that just make you want to throw on a sweater and listen to the Carpenter's Christmas album. 

Well, queue Pandora radio and a quick and easy recipe from Crazy Sexy Life and we're in business.  

I started with one butternut squash. Isn't she a beauty?

Scooped out the seeds and set aside (I'll roast the seeds later).

Chopped into cubes.  Note:  The recipe says to peel the squash first. For me, it's easier to leave the peel on and scoop the flesh out with a spoon after it's been cooked.  It's just a personal preference.  Plus, too much peeling hurts my hands.

Bake at 400 degrees for about 20 minutes or until you can easily pierce the squash with a fork.  Remember:  the smaller you make your cubes, the quicker it'll cook.

Scooped all the flesh out.  Be sure you wait for it to cool so you don't burn your hands.

Put squash in blender.  Oh, poor Oster blender, I know you're on your last leg but you have to hang in there for me.  I don't think the vita-mix fairies are visiting anytime soon so please quit smoking and making all that noise.  Thanks.

Add 1/2 cup water and blend.  You can add more water to get the right consistency, but don't overdo it or you'll have baby food.  Add 1 teaspoon of extra virgin olive oil, cinnamon and sea salt, to taste.  Blend again.  

I transferred to a pot and simmered on the stove.

Garnish with a little paprika and serve.

Find this, and other fabulously healthy recipes, here.

Happy November!
Kim 

Five Minute Friday - Remember

Last Friday was liberating.  To write without looking back, editing, second guessing.  To let my fingers dance across the keyboard, without judgment, without restriction...at least for five sweet minutes.

In Gypsy Mama's words, Five Minute Friday is "for fun, for love of the sound of words, for play, for delight, for joy and celebration at the art of communication."


And today, she asks us to give our best five minutes on...


REMEMBER


Ready?  Go.  


Stories of old Hawai`i.   
Of simpler days.  
Of calloused fingers and sun-blistered skin from a long day on the plantation. 
Children playing on dirt roads, bare feet, brown skin.  


She was the youngest of five.  
Korean and proud.  
Her hands, strong.  
Mind, stronger.  


She told us stories of old Hawai`i.  
Of picking mangos and pounding poi.  
Of war and loss.
Family taking care of family. 


I wish I would have listened better, taken notes, asked questions.  I wish I didn't get tired of hearing the same stories over and over again.  Of family I never met.  Of a Hawai`i I never knew.  There were so many lessons to be learned.  So much wisdom to be gleaned.  


But now.
Now she doesn't know:
My name.  
His face.
The stories.


She's quiet.


What is like to not remember?  


STOP.  

From Awareness to Prevention

October was Breast Cancer Awareness Month.  Pink ribbons were everywhere.  You couldn't go to a store without being reminded to "think pink".  Grocery stores lined their aisles with pink tags, indicating a portion of the sale would go toward breast cancer research.  Retail stores stocked the latest pink clothing lines and accessories.  Professional athletes and coaches supported the cause by wearing pink shoes, pink socks, pink ribbons.

As far as awareness goes, I think it's almost impossible to not be aware of breast cancer.  Or is it?  What does that pink ribbon signify?  What does it make you think?  And more importantly, how does it make you respond?  Simply buying a pink item is not enough.  While I do encourage us all to support such efforts monetarily, however big or small, we cannot stop there.  There needs to be action.  We need to take ownership of our health, our bodies and our lives.

I think we can all agree that early detection greatly increases one's chance of survival. Whether it's a mammogram, monthly self-checks, a pap smear or a colonoscopy, screening tests such as these can help detect disease in it's early stages so that you can proceed to treatment and ultimately to complete health.  I had my first mammogram in February after an abnormal MRI showed lesions on my spine.  The radiologists and oncologists considered breast cancer.  I didn't know that over 25% of patients with Stage 4 breast cancer experience metastases to the bone, most often the spine.  My mammogram ended up showing a mass in my breast and spots on my lymph nodes.  I was immediately sent for follow up ultrasounds and two biopsies.  Thankfully, both biopsies came back benign.  Ladies, can we talk about mammograms for a second?  Let me tell you - I walked out that test and couldn't believe that was it.  It was quick (under 5 minutes), painless (a little pushing and squeezing, but definitely not painful - and I was breastfeeding a 5 month old so if there was ever a time to be ultra-sensitive it would have been then).   Don't be afraid.  If you are over 40 years old, make an appointment and get it done.  If you are younger than 40 but have a history of breast cancer in your family, talk to your doctor, be sure you're doing monthly self-examinations and follow up with any concerns.

Okay, that being said, I want to talk about something that is near to my heart.  While early detection may increase our chances of survival, how much more will prevention increase our ability to live. Ultimately, the goal is to not have anything to detect.  Although we can't control everything, there is a whole lot we can do keep our bodies healthy, vibrant and free of dis-ease. And yes, I say this as one who lives with chronic disease and the pain that comes with it.  It's not a contradiction.  I am a wellness warrior on a quest for optimum health.  I cannot and will not accept the idea that my condition has no cure.  I focus instead on becoming whole, bringing my body, mind and spirit to a place of healing.

So my friends, I'm going to assume that you will take action and schedule your annual exams whatever they may be, but that's the easy part.  It's what you do the other 364 days of the year that I'm talking about.  Every morning that we wake up we have new choices to make:  what will we eat? what will we drink? what kind of people will we surround ourselves with? what kind of toxic crap will we allow? are we educating ourselves?  how do we treat our bodies? our minds? our spirits?

Hey, hey, no eye rolling.  If you think eating well and living healthy cost too much or takes too much time, you obviously haven't spent much time in the hospital.  Let me tell you, being sick is way more expensive than staying well.  Having a disease is way more time consuming than preparing a healthy meal, going to the gym or taking time to pray or meditate.

We'll take time this month (during NaBloPoMo) to talk about health and prevention.  There are so many bits of goodness we can get in to.  Oh, and I'd love to hear from you, too. Leave a comment and tell me what you do to live your best life.  Or better yet, let me know what you'd like to change or improve.  There is no shame here - we all need encouragement and support.  Together, let's choose to take back our health.  You deserve it!  Our families deserve it!



Let's do this!
Kim

Green Juice 101

People often ask me what's the difference between juicing and blending (green juice vs. green smoothies).  In my humble, laywoman's opinion, the difference can be explained in one sentence:  Juicing removes pulp (fiber) and smoothies leave it in.  Recently, I've been juicing and blending about the same amount - usually juicing at breakfast and blending for a quick power meal or snack. Here's a more detailed breakdown on the two:

Juicing:  

• Quick Nutrition:  Because juicing removes the plant's fiber, your digestive system gets a break and the nutrients from your juice go almost immediately to your bloodstream.  
• Instant Energy:  Gulping down a glass of green juice has an immediate effect. Forget coffee!  This is serious revitalization!  
• Too Many Greens:  Are you having a hard time eating the recommended daily amount of fruits and veggies?  No fear, juicing (and blending) will help with that.  I drink a colander full of greens before I leave the house in the morning.  It would take me all day to eat all of that.  

Blending:  

• Bring on the Fiber:  Unlike juicing, blending allows you to retain all the fiber - which sweeps up your digestive system and keeps you regular.  
• Meal in a Glass:  I've come to L.O.V.E. a green smoothie for lunch or a power snack.  They are both energizing and filling at the same time. There are no rules, but I try to stick with a 3:1 (veggie to fruit) ratio.  
• Kale, spinach or romaine lettuce
• Avocado or plain greek yogurt for protein and fat
• Frozen berries, berries, pear or apple
• Plain water, coconut water, almond milk or splash of apple juice 
• You can even add ground flax, chia or hemp seeds.  
• Crushed ice

My basic green juice consists of kale, romaine lettuce, cucumber, celery and a pear.  I change this up depending on what's in the fridge.  

There's very little prep.  Once all the veggies are washed, I just chop the cucumber and pear in half so it'll fit in the juicer.  Everything else can be torn by hand.  So easy!

I always line the "catcher" (the container on the juicer that collects all the pulp) with a gallon size ziploc bag.  I freeze the pulp (which is loaded with amazing fiber) and use it later to make vegetable broth.  I've also thrown it in soups, breads and other dishes.   Another bonus is it makes clean up a bit easier.

When juicing, I usually do leafy greens first and then follow it with something juicy (cucumber, pear, celery, etc).

This is some serious gold right here.

Bag o' fiber.  You don't want to dump this stuff.  Try it as "fillers" in other recipes: soups, stews, breads, or even a green smoothie.

Yummy goodness.  Okay, let's be honest.  You may not love your first few glasses of green but let me tell you something.  The more you eat and drink clean and green, the more your body will crave it and begin to sincerely enjoy the taste.  Other tips, squeeze some lime and stir before drinking or throw your greens into the freezer for a few minutes before juicing so it's cold when you drink.  Sometimes temperature alone can work wonders.  

Cheers!!

Kim 

NaBloPoMo - aka: I'm gettin' my bloggin' on

So.... I've decided to join in on NaBloPoMo, or National Blog Posting Month.  Basically, I'll be writing every day for the month of November.  Yup, all 30 days, rain or shine, sleep or no sleep, kids screaming or napping - I'll be here.  Normally I don't like the pressure and commitment to things like this. I've got enough going on.  But then I realized that sometimes, even when life is at it's craziest, we could use a little push, a little motivation - to become better.  So here I am, subjecting encouraging myself to sit and write.  I hope you'll join me.

Happy November!  

Kim