It's 3:30 a.m. and I've been up for the last 2 hours. The pain has been incredible - every movement sends a jolt so sleep just isn't happening. Maybe clearing my head onto this computer will help.
Good news is my latest biopsy and set of xrays all came back clear. Well, good news that it's clear, bad news that we're still in the dark. Obviously, the all clear does not mean all is well, or I wouldn't be sitting here unable to sleep. Nonetheless, still thankful. In my situation, every negative (test) is a positive.
My thoughts for the moment:
There's nothing like the quiet of night. It's amazing what you hear in the quiet. The creaking of the walls, the sound of my daughter gently snoring through her stuffed up nose, the whirl of the refrigerator, the breath of my husband. Sounds of life. Sounds that you wouldn't normally hear in the daytime, as it's drowned out by the TV, Pandora radio playing on the computer, cars driving by, kids playing. The trick is learning how to quiet our days so we can hear in the midst of life moving about us - turning down the noise or tuning out the distractions so that we can hear what really matters.
And with that, I think I'll try to sleep again...